Dr. Helen Hsu

3rd National Psychotherapy With Men Conference

So I got this announcement the other day:

"The 3rd National Psychotherapy With Men Conference is taking place on June 9th, 2012 at Fordham University in New York City, NY.      

We expect the available registrations to fill up quickly. So, we would like to offer you the opportunity to reserve your spot at a reduced early bird rate!  REGISTER NOW to take advantage of this reduced rate and register for the conference.  

To learn more about the 3rd National Psychotherapy With Men Conference including guest speakers, breakout sessions and the numerous benefits of attending, visit the conference website at www.fordham.edu/PMC."

Frankly, I love this idea.  It's too bad NYC is beyond my travel capacity right now  because I would be quite interested in this conference.  Gender matters as a core facet of our identities and experiences, and psychotherapy has not always served boys and men well.

One of the more common issues we have to train counseling interns on - is how to engage and help boys and men who may not be as verbose, expressive, or articulate as females.  Let's face it, Psychology is a pretty wordy field.  We like to write long dissertations and articles, give presentations, engage in insight oriented and validating discussions, explore our thoughts and behaviors and describe them in talk therapy. For those who are not comfortable engaging in this way, it behooves the therapist to find what works.  

At the school sites, some of us shoot Nerf basketballs into little hoops while chatting with boys.  We build towers or sand tray battle scenes that depict emotions in a way words fail to.

There is even data collected at our own clinic which shows that boys tend to show more symptom improvement when paired with a male therapist.  We have no data to explain why that is-but we have lots of theories.  Do males identify more with a male therapist? Can the male counselor be a role model or father figure? Do male therapist just "get" other guys and their communication styles differently? Do male clients feel they need to act differently with therapists of different genders?

Of course there are always exceptions.  Recently, a close friend asked me for a therapist referral.  He's a USMC war veteran, and I thought a male therapist who understood military culture might be the best fit.  Yet when I gave him some names of good psychologists I know - he hesitated.  "You know, I actually think I'd be more comfortable opening up with a woman. You know - maybe it's that whole Alpha Male thing but I don't think I can spill my guts like that with another guy."  Point taken.

To learn more:

Psychotherapy with Men Conference

Bread & Recovery

Pondering the rather unimpressive bread offerings at Safeway this week- I came upon an organic loaf boasting "Say No to Bread on Drugs", 16 grains and 5 seeds. Promising.

The verdict on the bread - very tasty.  Hearty and healthy and good both savory (turkey sandwich) and sweet (with orange marmalade).

What's even more inspiring, is Dave's personal journey.  Take a few minutes to view the video - he talks about going WAY off track in life, the way (as so many of us do ) he misunderstood his father, got caught up in drugs and petty crime, hit bottom in prison, and ultimately had to take responsibility for his choices.  From there, psychiatric treatment, the love of family, and his own hard work has led to quite a thriving bread story...

Dave's Killer Bread

I was very moved by this story, because he is sharing a story we don't hear enough about.  I have friends and clients who have kicked major addictions, who have struggled valiantly with severe mental health conditions-and people really can get better.  Treatments exist and they do work.  Sometimes it takes multiple rounds to do the trick, but when a person is ready - things can change. 

I do believe in punishment and making people accountable - but I also know that giving up on a "lost cause" person is often missing the resilience and humanity that still can exist under the illness.

Separations and Children

Many families, friends, and lovers have to endure separations due to military deployment, economic necessity, educational opportunity, incarceration, political strife, divorce, illness... In the age of Skype and texting, it's hard to imagine how humans ever survived long separations from their loved ones back in the days of waiting for boat-mail or lengthy journeys via horse caravan! It's hard enough for adults, but for children separations can be particularly frightening. The fear of abandonment lies at the heart of all of us, with its roots in childhood-when we depended on our caretakers for existence. When we are small, and in control of nothing - being away from family can be scary indeed. We always wonder if the parent or loved one is thinking of us. We worry if they are okay, if they miss us, if they obsess as we do... At YFS, our staff have worked with families enduring all sorts of separations. I wanted to share one of our favorite books for children dealing with separation from loved ones. Maybe you can incorporate this into your child's bedtime reading rotation:

TED talks: Dr. Nuland on recovery from Depression

As a fan of Dr. Nuland's books, I have an added appreciation of his journey from life threatening depression to a good second life.

He was treated with ECT, which is used only for the most severe depressions which do not respond to other treatments, and this was more than 30 years ago.  Watch the video of his talk, and come up with a mantra for yourself (maybe not the F bomb that he chose!)

Dr, Nuland on recovery from Depression

Family Caretaker Support

The rapidly aging demographic of our population has led to some important awareness about the hardships upon those who caretake for elderly loved ones.  Caretaking is an exhausting task that can put caretakers at risk for burn-out and exacerbate their own health issues. 

It is critical that caretakers get support, both practical respite care as well as emotional understanding and functional education.

When you have a loved one who is mentally ill - the task of caretaking may be just as great.  Family members often react in anger or fear when they don't comprehend a person's symptoms. Or, they oft go in the other extreme, going out of their way to "baby" the ill person out of concerns that they are "sick".  Neither extreme is helpful. Punishing someone who is ill does not make them better.  But treating a person who is ill yet, still intelligent and functional, as if they were totally disabled can be enabling and insulting.

Basica mental health education for family members can go a long way in making life healthier for everyone.

Locally in the Tri Cities area, there is an upcoming Family-to-Family Education program run by the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) and Family Education and Resource Center (FERC).

This series of 12 classes will help caregivers understand and support individuals who are suffering from serious mental illness (major depression, bipolar disorder, schizoaffective or schzophrenia, borderline personality disorder, anxiety, OCD, and panic disorders).  It will also address how to best support your ill loved one while maintaining your own long term well being.

The course is taught by trained volunteers who share your experience of having a loved one who is struggling with one of these mental disorders.

This FREE training series will begin August 31, 2011 from 6:30-9:00 p.m. in Union City

For Detailed information and to pre-register (registration required as spaces are limited): 

Michelle Wms-Smith (510)790-1010 or Michele@mhaac.org

FERC

The Triathlon Lesson

Every single supervisor, client, colleague, intern, or student I've had in the last 8 years has heard me rave about the mental health benefits of being physcially active.

There's a healthy body of research at this point (no pun intended) that indicates exercise can relieve mild mood and anxiety symptoms as easily as medications - and with no expense nor side effects. 

It always boggles my mind to speak with people who never break a sweat and live on Hot Cheetos-yet they can't seem to figure out why they don't feel well!

Of course exercise is just one aspect of health- a person in optimal health also needs to make time for social connections, meaningful work, a larger community, a healthy diet, and family.  We're all constrained by the budget of both time and funds in how we exercise. 

Even a short brisk walk break around a building during the workday is beneficial.  At public schools we gave kids pedometers and reminded them to aim for 2000 steps a day- doesn't matter if those steps are taken in the home, at school, at the store, just MOVE.  As a frugal graduate student I used to do yoga videos in my living room.

A colleague invited me to join in a relay sprint triathlon when I was on my final pre doctoral internship and struggling to complete my dissertation.  The camraderie and sheer joyful fun of running and biking, swimming and sweating turned out to be a powerful mental boost.  Indeed it built confidence and energy at a time when both had been flagging.  Since then I've "graduated" to 5K runs, 10K's, half marathons, full spring triathlons, and a 194 mile team relay.

I haven't participated in a triathlon for a few years now, mostly due to the expense of the gear and my limited availability for training.  Yet I always think about the experience fondly- the incredible thrill of competing against myself, and facing new challenges at every hard won step.  Mind you, these were mere sprint distance triathlons, but the rewards of completing a once impossible-sounding goal went far beyond the physical.  What was even more inspirational, was seeing dozens upon dozens of competitors who were significantly older than I am, and some youngsters too.  It is never too late, nor too early to get out there and do your best.

I recently attended a presentation By Dr. Cory Nyamora about the Therapist's role in reducing Childhood Obesity, and found it very timely.  The United States is facing a health epidemic of childhood obesity that threatens a painful future for far too many kids. 

I wish all these children had someone to guide them & teach them that their bodies are not the enemy!  Children have an inherent exuberance that tends to get dampened by too many days sitting in school chairs, and too many hours zoning on TV or video games.  Yet kids respond well to new adventures.  They need guidance to push themselves into learning their hidden potentials, to learn that after the intial discomfort-exercise becomes a natural high.

Dr. Nyamora runs a program that I wish I could enroll all our client families into: Fit Family Triathlon Team.  It's 12 week program with kids 8-14 years old that readies them (and a parent or two) for a California Kids' Triathlon.  Every Saturday the families go on fun outings to lose weight and build strength while spending quality time with family and new friends. 

For more information about Fit Family Triathlon Team & Dr. Cory Nyamora:

Endurance Center

Interested in a starter Sprint Triathlon?  A couple great local races for newbies:

Tri for Fun

Mermaid Series

 

Race to Nowhere - Fremont event to discuss testing & pressure on kids

I will be speaking as a member of a panel after the 7 pm showing May 21, 2011 of Race to Nowhere.  Please come watch the movie that has parents and communities talking about how high stakes testing is damaging education and child health. 

PRESS RELEASE: May 6, 2011

Contacts:

Lara York, Fremont Education Foundation 510-501-9675

Debra Watanuki, City of Fremont’s Human Relations Commission 510-921-8086

Sherea Westra, Fremont Unified District Teachers Association 510-299-4161

RACE SO WE ALL WIN

FREMONT, CA:  School reform has become an urgent national issue which must be discussed at our local level, which is why the Fremont Education Foundation (FEF), the City of Fremont’s Human Relations Commission (HRC) and the Fremont Unified District Teachers Association (FUDTA) have joined together to bring “Race to Nowhere” to Fremont on Saturday, May 21^st for two screenings at 2:00 and 7:00 p.m.

Unlike the other education documentaries, “Race to Nowhere” is the only film that shows what is actually happening to our kids as a result of current national policies and practices obsessed with testing, performance and competition rather than meaningful teaching and learning. “Race to Nowhere” finally gives voice to those on the front lines who are most affected by education policies - the students and teachers themselves. “Race to Nowhere” also is the only film to spotlight the intersection between health and education. “Race to Nowhere” invites all stakeholders to come together to find workable solutions. 

Filmmaker Vicki Abeles shares,  “As a mother, I experienced the stress firsthand and realized that no one was talking about it.  I felt compelled to speak out about this crisis by making a film and giving voice to the students, teachers, and parents.  I wanted to expose a deeper truth about our education system.  We are graduating a generation of robo-students, unable to think and work independently, creatively and collaboratively.”

“After viewing this film, I was compelled to find a way for more Fremontonians to share in this powerful experience and have meaningful conversations with the students, parents, grandparents,  teachers, business leaders, civic leaders throughout the City to find ways help our children lead healthier lives.  Our lives are successful not only measured our accomplishments but our journeys, mistakes and happiness.  When do we let our children today make mistakes?” Lara York, Board Member Fremont Education Foundation and Fremont Unified School District. 

“FUDTA invites all its members to explore these issues, together with the community, to share our experiences and hear those of others,” Sherea Westra, Vice-President of the Fremont Unified District Teachers Association.

“The health and well-being of our children is fundamental for our communities to thrive; it is a top priority for our society’s future.  We cannot pass the buck and say this is a problem for the schools to solve.  The solution must come from the entire community joining together to forge true reforms to ensure that our children have every opportunity to be healthy, inspired and contributing members of our communities,” Debra Watanuki, Commissioner Human Relations Commission.

“Race to Nowhere” is a call to action to challenge current assumptions on how to best prepare the youth of America to become healthy, bright, contributing and leading citizens. After seeing the film, your views on education and childhood will forever be changed.  The film empowers everyone to get involved and take ownership of what’s happening in our schools and communities. 

“Race to Nowhere”

Saturday, May 21^st

Washington West, Anderson Auditorium

2:00 p.m. screening followed by a discussion

7:00 p.m. screening followed by a panel discussion

Doors open 30 minutes before.

Purchase tickets online at: www.racetonowhere.com

$10 in advance.  $15 at the door.

Seating is limited.

 

 

The Fremont Education Foundation is a non-profit, tax-exempt, public charity, established in 1991, to encourage increased community involvement and investment in our schools. Our members include parents, educators, school administrators, business people, and others from our community.  We are an independent foundation that works closely with, but is separate from, the Fremont Unified School District.

The Fremont Unified District Teachers Association was chartered in 1965 and is the professional organization for the certificated personnel of the Fremont Unified School District. Our total membership is 1,800 full and part-time professionals. We are a charter of the California Teachers Association/National Education Association (CTA/NEA).

The City of Fremont's Human Relations Commission promotes and helps create a community
environment in which all men, women and children, regardless of race, religion, national origin, gender, disability or sexual orientation, may live, learn, work and play in harmony.

Visiting at Mission Peak Unitarian Universalist

Youth and Family Services (YFS) was invited to pay a visit to the congregation at Mission Peak Unitarian Universalist in Fremont.  Always happy to do outreach and talk with people about mental health work and education, I volunteered my Sunday morning.

As a public employee and non-secular person, I ground my work and my life in values of health and equality.  I try to avoid my own biases from creeping into the work by centering on the simple principle that one should strive to do what is healthy and promotes the well being of all.  All of us who serve the public need to keep our own personal beliefs and customs out of the business of helping those who may have very different belief systems. 

Religion can be a wonderous force in society, or it can be a source of great manipulation and harm.  I have seen people's whose faith saved and changed lives. And I have seen those who were judged and berated and harmed by dogmatic faith.

I appreciate the Unitarian Universalist mission statements and action guide which includes:

Providing educational experiences for all ages that encourage free and responsible search for truth and meaning and an acceptance of religious and social diversity.

Serving the community in accordance with our social conscience and our Unitarian Universalist principles.

Justice, equity, and compassion in human relations

The goal of world community with peace, liberty, and justice for all

Respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part

This day's sermon focused on the notion of "To Thine Own Self Be True", but how being true has more to do with finding meaning and giving of oneself than with wallowing in our own pleasures and laziness.  I couldn't agree more.  I have found incredible life meaning and satisfaction by serving others, that would have been impossible by any of the other means we use to placate ourselves in modern society (shopping, TV viewing, drinking).

I was invited to the pulpit to share about the work of YFS, our presence in 21 public schools, our training of 25 graduate level interns, and the families we serve in English, Farsi, Spanish, Mandarin, and Hindi.  How our children suffer from grief and loss, anxiety and depression.  How families right here locally have become homeless, and the impact of divorce, incarceration, and other life adjustments that children struggle to understand and cope with.  How our infant toddler youth program teaches parenting and attachment to parents who may never have received nurturing care themselves.

Near the end of a lovely service that featured music (I'll admit my favorite was a Tom Waits song titled "Come up to the House"), meditation, thoughts from Ralph Waldo Emerson, a humorous children's story, and the sharing of personal joys and sorrows, the congregation passed around a collections plate on behalf of YFS.  I was touched that this small group of new friends I met merely an hour ago, gave generously of themselves and donated $500 to benefit the children and families of Fremont. It always moves me to be reminded that there are people who care enough to help those they do not personally know, simply because it is kind and right.

I ended my visit by accepting their kind offerings to the children and families of YFS, (and making an adorable set of handmade purchases in their holiday boutique to add to the play therapy toys at the office).

 

For more information about Mission Peak Unitarian Universalist Congregation overall:

office@mpuuc.org

www.mpuuc.org

A mental health support group for people living with depression and other related conditions meets Monday evenings 7:30-9:00 pm at the office of Reaching Across at 3833 Peralta Ave., Suite D in Fremont and is open to people inside and outside of the congregation.  For more info: Rev. Barbara Meyers at 510-796-5722 or Scotty 510-745-9500.

A support group for Families to help and cope with a family member suffering mental illness meets 2nd and 4th Tuesdays a month at 7:00 pm at Holly Community Center in Union City 31600  Alvarado Blvd. For more info: Patty Espeseth 510-727-2700 ext 4156 or Peggy Rahman 510-794-0860

Creative Survival

It's difficult to articulate what a therapist "does" in session.  Often people will ask how I "fix" people or "set them straight" or "manipulate" them.  I don't feel any of those things are my goal nor my role.

Sure, it's essential that any good psychotherapist have proper education, relevant work experience, and licensure.  But therapy is a process of co-creation, and not the only path to healing by any means. 

I always encourage clients to seek regular means of self expression, self validation, and self encouragement.  Eventually every client must graduate, so to speak, from therapy, and carry on the their growing new skills and evolving confidence on their own.       

Creative endeavors are such a fundamental human experience, so intrinsic within all human societies that I dare say it's a need.  Be it music, literature, sculpture, dance, painting, poetry - whatever the medium, creativity is healing.  Because constructive self expression is healing.  for example there have been studies which have demonstrated how singing relieves depressive symptoms, or how art therapy benefits traumatized children. 

Often, it's through our creative passions that we sort out our muddled motivations and thoughts and begin learning to accept and own our emotional lives.  It generally happens quite naturally, and is the ideal means for those who don't have the time, money, or verbal proclivities for talk therapy.  Often, we (therapists) utilize art and creativity into the therapy work.  Some of the most powerful moments I have had the privilege to share with clients came while discussing a powerful song, creating a symbolic work of graphic art, or acting out an emotional dilemma with physical tools.

Two small bits I wanted to share today which happened to have triggered this post:

While eating lunch & reading Writer's Digest tips from authors, I read Wade Rouse:

"Most of us, especially writers, are defined by our fears. They strangle us, prevent us from finding our voices, pursuing our passion, writing what calls to us. So, turn "FEAR" into Free Every Artistic Response. When you do, your true voice will be unleashed."

Wade Rouse 

How fantastic is that? Free Every Artistic Response. Imagine how your days would feel if that Artistic response governed your choices and moods instead of your fears.

Next, I watched a YouTube video featuring a song from a 19 year old Cancer Survivor. Megan McNeil wrote the song during some of her darkest days-and with the support of professional producers is helping to raise funds for childhood cancer research.  Her strong voice and will to fight for life are inspiring.  For those of us who have loved someone battling Cancer, her song is like a rallying cry to keep on fighting the good fight. What a luminous example of someone using her creative skills to channel fear and pain into something remarkable: 

Will To Survive

Suicide and Asian Americans

"My Story" Depression, Suicide, and Asian American Women

I was recently perusing the website 8Asians.com and came across a personal essay addressing the high rates of untreated mental health illnesses in our communities. 

The author June Shieh does an intensely honest job sharing her experience of how stigma and lack of education can manifest in tragedy.  She is also an example of the resilience of those who weather life's storms. 

A worthwhile read, and encourage more of us to speak up and speak out to spare others from their undiagnosed and/or untreated illnesses, and to share our own stories.